Can Changing Your Location Give You a New Start in Life?

Can Changing Your Location Give You a New Start in Life?

The world is full of sayings and myths about moving, and some of resonate particularly after experiencing abuse or other types of trauma. Take the oft-quoted words by Shahenshah Hafeez Khan, “We feel that we can hide or run from problems, but we fail to understand that it isn’t the problem we hide or run from, but our capacity to handle that problem.” These words are beautiful, and they may apply when you are repressing thoughts or emotions, or denying pain that exists and that can manifest itself through anxiety, depression, and a myriad physical symptoms. But for those who have been abused, moving one’s physical space can do wonders for their health and well-being, and symbolize a new path taken and promising things ahead. 

Why a Move Can Benefit You

Depending on the size of the area you live in and your social circle, you may be forced to come across relatives or friends of someone who abused you, and these familiar faces, some of whom may have defended the perpetrator, can trigger PTSD, anxiety, and depression. If you are currently seeing a therapist, then you know that your mindset matters greatly when it comes to the success of therapies like cognitive-behavioral therapy or dialectical behavior therapy. These approaches aim at either reframing negative thought patterns or dealing with pain and distress, without hampering your ability to live a full, values-led life. It can be very difficult, however, to make progress if you are living in fear, or if the sight or words of certain people pull you back into a tunnel that you are trying to make your way out of. Moving gives you a chance to be you, to trust new people, and to be in a social circle in which people do not confuse what happened with your identity. 

If You Move, Do So Mindfully

If you are considering a move, as tempted as it may be to pack your things quickly and leave, even within your urgency, aim to employ the skill of mindfulness for a stress-free move. Moving itself is a stressful activity, as it involves physical and mental work. As you prepare your things, use mindfulness techniques to lower your heart and breathing rate. This can be as simple as inhaling to the count of four, exhaling to the count of four, holding your breath to the count of four, then repeating the exercise a few times. It can also help to meditate by focusing your mind on a feeling, connecting with your thoughts, or visualizing that you are in a peaceful place. This activity will ground you and bring you back to the present moment, so you can work in an organized fashion, without forgetting anything or overpacking. The last few nights before your departure, make sure to get good sleep. Doing so will help you feel more energetic about the work that lies ahead.

Choose Your New Destination Wisely

Your new home (be it for a few weeks or a few years) should ideally have a combination of factors that will help you feel secure, safe, and protected. Prior to leaving, check out the destinations’ crime rate, as well as nearby amenities and green areas. With more millennials moving to the suburbs, you don’t have to be in a big city to have access to a wide range of facilities on your doorstep. Also, prioritizing nature is far more important than you may have realized. Studies have shown that spending even a few minutes in a forest or other green space can lower your heart rate and blood pressure, reduce the force of anxiety, and promote a better mood. If possible, go somewhere where you already have close, trusted connections. They can help you settle in, perhaps even find work, and commence a new chapter in your safer, happier life.

You may not be able to run away from the past, but moving will make it easier not to want to. A fresh start, a new environment, and the chance to flee from painful reminders of the past can help you enter into the right frame of mind you need to heal and recover. When moving, aim to do so mindfully instead of in a rush, ensuring you have time to pack all you need, say goodbye to loved ones, and feel rested instead of fatigued. Choose a place with a reputation for safety, a good climate, and numerous natural spots in which to de-stress and reconnect with your inner world.