Advice and rhetorical questions

Advice and rhetorical questions: Giving and receiving I have found, through my own experience and from reading many posts on the forum, that making the life changing choice to heal and move towards recovery, is a massively scary decision. It requires a careful and delicate balance of safety, trust and … Continue reading

Consensual sex after abuse

Consensual sex after abuse I find it surprising, that sex has never really been an issue or a problem for me; you would think that following a childhood, littered with harrowing sexual abuse, that there may be some issues regarding consensual sex, as an adult. Up until a year ago, … Continue reading

Mindfulness

Mindfulness Mid way into therapy, I was finding that I was disappearing off in to my head, completely consumed with the recovery of memories, and trapped, with increasingly powerful flashbacks and no escape. Overwhelming, is such a clichéd word and over used, but it does sum up the experience (or … Continue reading

Safety, Trust and Control

Safety, Trust and Control I was ready to tap into my trapped emotion in order to release it, when I finally embarked into therapy. I wanted to get to a place where everyday triggers did not effect me in such a big way. I wanted to be in a place … Continue reading

Follow up session: My therapy full stop

Follow up session: My therapy full stop I usually read out my journal entries at the beginning of therapy sessions, which leads to a deeper level of reflective thinking (in my safe place). This in turn, leads to the type of connective conversations that I have found invaluable throughout the … Continue reading

Life After Therapy

Life after therapy The first part of this piece, contains extracts taken from journal entries, because I think they accurately depict the state of mind I had from day to day, after therapy initially ended. I really wanted to capture how I was feeling at the time in this piece, … Continue reading

The End of Therapy

The End of Therapy Thinking of the end: I have learnt, faced and remembered so much since I started therapy. I have spent hours talking, processing and writing about all of this crap, sharing some of it publicly. I have found a little bit of purpose, and sourced some courage … Continue reading

Positive Self Regard

Positive self regard Finding purpose I met Tanya (yes same name) through the school my children go to and at the time, Tanya also had children in the same school. None of our children (7 between us) were in the same classes, but Tanya and I, were both pregnant with … Continue reading

What has therapy been about for me?

What has therapy been about for me? What I wanted to get out of therapy My therapist asked me what I wanted to get out of our sessions in week one, but I left without telling her what I really wanted to gain from our time together. I was so … Continue reading

The Child Within

The Child Within I became aware of this hurt, scared, lost little child in a therapy session several weeks ago and although more than a little freaked out, I recognised her instantly. She was me; little me; my inner child; and I know this because I whole heartedly and heartbreakingly … Continue reading