Back to Love

BACK TO LOVE When love first tasted the lips of being human, it started to sing, Rumi About me: I am a 57-year-old mother of 2 sons and an overjoyed grandmother of 5. I work as a Counsellor in Private Practice. I have a huge belief in the transformative power … Continue reading

Survivor Book of the Month – January 21

Survivor Book of the Month A good self-help book can be an excellent way to kick start, continue or bolster a Survivor’s healing journey.  Every month I will bring to you a book that has helped my own recovery. This first book is relatively new to my library’s arsenal of … Continue reading

The 4Fs: A Trauma Typology in Complex PTSD

The 4Fs: A Trauma Typology in Complex PTSD By Pete Walker, M.A. Psychotherapy (pete-walker.com) This paper describes a trauma typology for differentially diagnosing and treating Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. This model elaborates four basic defensive structures that develop out of our instinctive Fight, Flight, Freeze and Fawn responses to … Continue reading

HAVOCA 20th Anniversary

HAVOCA 20th Anniversary HAVOCA has now been online for nearly 20 years!! Our Trustee, Jamie Harms, started HAVOCA back in July 2001 as a way to provide support to other survivors of child abuse.  Initially conceived as a portal for survivors to find services and information that didn’t alienate them, … Continue reading

A New Chapter

A New Chapter How Brave Are You?   Brené Brown writes, “Owning your story and loving yourself through the process is the bravest thing you will ever do.” But the quote that is often left out is what she says after, “and further, it allows us to write a new ending.” So, … Continue reading

Surviving the Holiday Season as a Survivor

Surviving the Holiday Season as a Survivor

The holiday season can be a terrible time for survivors of abuse.  TV scenes, family gatherings and pictures of joy and happiness, plastered all over social media can be the catalyst for memories and flashbacks that haunt victims of abuse.  It is understandable that survivor’s feelings are heightened during this period.  As a very high proportion of abuse occurs within the family unit it is hardly surprising that times that bring families together, are the times that generate the most pain for Survivors. Continue reading

Nurturing Physical And Mental Health Are Key To Abuse Recovery

Nurturing Physical And Mental Health Are Key To Abuse Recovery Experiencing child abuse has specific effects on human health and wellbeing. Research shows, for instance, that in organizations such as the armed forces, a far higher percentage of mental health disorders (28.7%) can be attributed to past child abuse experiences (compared to … Continue reading

Songs of Healing: How Music Therapy Can Help Survivors Of Abuse Find Closure

Songs of Healing: How Music Therapy Can Help Survivors Of Abuse Find Closure Trauma survivors dealing with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) may have trouble verbally expressing their problems. A team of researchers in Finland found that patients who received music therapy showed a 50% or greater improvement in treating their symptoms … Continue reading

Harming Your Child by Making Him Your Parent

Harming Your Child by Making Him Your Parent A very subtle way to create damage in your child is to turn that child into your parent. This process is called parentification, not to be confused with parenting. Parentification can be defined as a role reversal between parent and child. A child’s … Continue reading