Adult Survivors of Sexual Abuse

Although this piece appears to be aimed at sexual abuse survivors its underlying message is applicable across the board. This tip weighs true for any writing/advice/information that seems to be aimed at one specific type of abuse. More often than not you will find a core message that is applicable to any situation. It is up to you to draw the parallels.

Adult Survivors of Sexual Abuse

Adult Survivors of Sexual AbuseThis is for you. Through my love of writing, I wanted to express myself in a way I could help others. It feels good to write. It’s my gift in life, and I choose to use it to the best of my ability. If I can help just one person, then I have succeeded in my goal. Please enjoy what comes from my heart, as well as thought provoking quotes from authors unknown.


Always hold your head high and be proud of who you are. Remember how far you have come and what you’ve accomplished in life despite your past. You are a survivor.

Don’t let your abuse overcome your chance for happiness. If you let it control your life; then your perpetrators have won. He/she no longer has control, you do. You have the power to overcome your abuse; you have the courage and strength to succeed.

Understand you are not alone in your journey to heal. Adult Survivors world wide, stand with you hand in hand. Counsellors, too, are a valuable part of the healing process. Don’t be afraid to invest time with them in your life’s journey. They are not judgmental; they are compassionate, caring people.

Let your today’s be filled with happiness, your tomorrows with visions of hope. Yesterday is already a dream; tomorrow is only a vision, but today well lived, makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a vision of hope.

Take time to invest in yourself, you’re worth it. Do something that makes you feel wonderful, truly glad to be alive. Go for walks; reflect during your quiet times. Reflect on what’s good in your life; your family, your friends; those who love you.

See how important and truly unique you are. You are one of a kind, no one can replace you. God put you here for a reason. You matter. In this world, you will make a difference in the lives you’ve touched, leaving a lasting mark in their hearts forever.

Use your inner-strength and realize how strong you really are. You’ve overcome insurmountable odds and survived. Feel proud of yourself and know you’ve done the best in your circumstances.

Remember, you can close your eyes for the things you don’t want to see, but you can’t close your heart to the things you don’t want to feel.

Value what’s most important in life, you. You only live once. Cherish the life, God has given you. Nurture yourself, love yourself unconditionally.

Invite happiness into your heart. Embrace your loved ones, family and friends. Friendship truly is the gold thread that ties hearts together. Keep them close to your heart throughout your journey in life.

Voice your pain, let yourself be heard. There is always someone who will listen with an open heart. If you can only whisper, keep trying, no matter how hard it seems it will get easier.

Open your mind to success. Being successful gives you such a sense of achievement. Believing in you is the first secret to success. Always believe in yourself.

Release your pain by focusing on the good things in life. The positive out weighs the negative by far. See beyond your emotional pain and realize what it’s doing to you physically. Suicide attempts, substance abuse, self-harming, are ways of showing pain, crying out for help. See the good in yourself, learn to love, and most importantly, forgive. Only then, can you stop the cycle of self-abuse.

Share with other survivors.It’s amazing what can be learned from each other, a wealth of information. There are so many people that stay silent, and through reading stories, learn that they are not alone. Through shared experiences, survivors become stronger in facing their own. Sharing means healing; healing brings inner-peace.

Open your eyes and see things as they really are. Don’t be blinded by your past. Your eyes are the windows to your soul, let them guide you toward a better future filled with hope and happiness.

Focus on making better choices. Whether you choose to enrich your lives with those choices is ultimately your decision. Only you can change your life, only you have the power to do that. If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again.

Smile and don’t give up on yourself. Giving up is not an option, nor is giving in. Great results cannot be achieved at once, and you must be satisfied to advance in life as you walk, step by step.

Educate others about sexual abuse. Speak from your heart and share through your experience. In doing this, your abuse will not be in vain. By educating children, they become stronger; they can protect themselves and survive the unspeakable if it happens. If they have knowledge, they use it, and seek help from those they love.

X’s and O’s mean kisses and hugs. It’s important you feel comfortable in sharing them. Don’t hold back; express your emotions and show others you truly care. Feel good about you; feel good about showing those you love through expression. Kisses and hugs go a long way.

Use words to help you heal. Write your thoughts and feelings; fill empty pages with hopes and dreams. Journal daily, bring life to a book you can call your own. Words are powerful, their messages instilled in the minds of those who read them. Words can heal; they bring solace, comfort and inner-peace. They can enrich your life, forever changing who you are, who you want to become.

Accept, love, and forgive the child within. In accepting and forgiving, you will learn to love and respect who you are now. In doing this, you become whole and can then nurture yourself to become a healthy adult.Only then, can you begin your journey to happiness.

Learn to enjoy life, live each day to the fullest and cherish new memories. Imprint them in your heart, never let them go. There are no guarantees for tomorrow, so live for today.

Always have goals and don’t give up until you reach them. We all have hopes and dreams; it’s up to us to live them. If you want to reach your dream, you must stay on course, past the point you would normally have given up.

Be the best you can be, reach out to others, giving a part of yourself in the simplest way. A smile, a hug, a twinkle in your eye could make all the difference. A person remembers that smile; they remember your warmth, your compassionate side. It’s never forgotten.

Understand your need and love of family and find that inner-peace you so desperately need. When you do, you will find only happiness in your heart. Family and friends are hidden treasures, seek them and enjoy their riches.

Seek comfort from your loved ones. Embrace in their love and let it heal you inside. Grow in their strength, become stronger, become like the willow tree that bends in the wind instead of breaking.

Envision a better future when you become happier, more content with who you are. To do this, learn to love yourself; learn to forgive yourself and trust in those you love. Find inner-peace in your heart, mind and soul. Know the trials and tribulations of life will always be there. The rollercoaster rides shall never cease. Learn to deal with them the best way you know how. Stay strong. Stay positive. Be the best you can be; be proud of who you are. You are a survivor.


5 Responses to Adult Survivors of Sexual Abuse

  1. HAVOCA says:

    Cheryl is one of those people that always give. She is a kind hearted and genuine person who has lived through child abuse and emerged as a survivor. She uses her literal talent to convey her feelings through poetry and story writing. If interested, you can find some of her poetry and writings in the quiet corner of the website. You can contact Cheryl at

  2. Kimberly, 4-18+ says:

    I felt that you were writing about me/speaking to me personally. Thank you for writing this piece! That’s all easier said than done, but I hope to be in a better place in the future. I was sexually abused from age 4-18 and then raped in college when I was drunk (which is how I deal with everything). Right now I don’t feel like things will ever get better!

  3. Steph says:

    Thankyou cheryl! I’m a paternal abuse 6-16 and rape survivor. What you say really helps me tonight when i’m having trouble sleeping with memories of it all. Will try and write how i’d like my life to be now, inspired by you. Thanks

  4. Richard says:

    The first time I was on your website you had him what a bit of information about incest survivors my wife was survivors in America has been shaking for a chef from here anyway I just wondered what happened to your story incest survivors I couldn’t find it

  5. tina says:

    I am 49 I was 3 when it happened.. I blocked things out and then at 21 when my son was born the tsunami of memories flooded me. there is much to much to type
    But reading this makes me know now that I am searching for healing and God is listening. I need support, its sad, disgusting, a messed up kind of difficult !!!tough but i am strong….. still i need help so I can release

Leave a comment - please note HAVOCA does not provide direct support via these comments. If you would like support please use our contact form or forums. Please use a name you are comfortable sharing online.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.