'Why hasn't my thread been answered?'

[Jamie]

Please don't be offended if your post isn't answered immediately. Normally a post receives a reply within 48hrs - but sometimes the gap can be longer. It isn't a reflection on you or anything you have written - sometimes it can be very simple - the forums are perhaps quiet and therefore people don't have time read and reply to everything. Staff may be busy doing other stuff and intend to get around to posts at a later date. Other reasons may be more complicated - people read your post and are unable to comment because it has really struck a cord with them, it may be that your post doesn't really lead to an 'answer'. Some of the sections are typically there to allow you to vent, write and share rather than ask questions or ask for advice. So think about which section you want to write in and think about whether you need a reply or whether you are just happy to 'get it out there'.

Sharing stories and opening up are bound to leave us all feeling vulnerable and raw. If you feel upset or anxious because no one has replied then perhaps ask more direct questions or leave it for a few days and then come back and see if the thread has been added to.

Personally I'm forever leaving suggestions and asking for feedback - very rarely do I get more than one or two replies. I don't read anything into it because I understand people use this place for different reasons. a very large percent of members just come here, sit quietly and read the posts. So I would encourage anyone who posts but feels 'miffed' when they don't get a reply to please please keep posting. You'll be amazed at how much hope, love and healing your posts can provide, even if they aren't replied to straight away or even at all.

Warm regards

Jamie

[Liz]

The reason why we come to HAVOCA in the first place is that we are ALL survivors of abuse and we are all at different stages of this journey that none of us ever asked to go on but which we find ourselves as travellers on with ppl here becoming our companions.

I know for myself that reading someone's graphic experiences of their abuse is difficult, emotive. i get very angry at what other ppl have had to endure. And like everyone else here sometimes what i read triggers my past and my experiences - regardless of how far down the road of recovery i am. And these days i feel i am well down that road though sometimes the road turns back on itself, or i meet deadends, or country i thought i passed a while back...in other words a messy, unlinear painful walk with patches of sunlight, hope and healing along the way. Sometimes i just feel i do not have the words within me to do justice to the pain and horror which others have written down.

That doesnt mean you can't write it down - not at all - it just means that sometimes i need time and space before i can come back and reply. And that reply perhaps will just be an acknowledgement that i have read your post, acknowledged your pain. That indeed you have been heard which is what we were once denied.

Liz x

[MoreThenIAM]

I have read this. Keep plugging away.