Poll - Inner Child

This forum is open to members and guests and allows a straw poll to be taken across the broader sector of all survivors.

How aware are you of your inner child?

You may select 1 option

 
 
View results

User avatar
Jamie
Trustee
Trustee
Posts: 8539
Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2005 7:12 pm
Location: North Wales, UK
Has thanked: 128 times
Been thanked: 390 times
Contact:

Poll - Inner Child

Post by Jamie »

On a scale of one to ten, how aware are you of your inner child?
User avatar
poppet
Member
Member
Posts: 1553
Joined: Thu Sep 08, 2011 8:08 pm
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 2 times

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by poppet »

I voted 10. But two and a half years ago - before I started disclosing and discussing my past I would have voted 1.
User avatar
workensleep
New Member
New Member
Posts: 22
Joined: Mon Jul 29, 2013 11:59 pm
Been thanked: 2 times

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by workensleep »

The phrase makes me terribly sad. I always just think of the person I could have been... I think of what was lost, of how trapped I was/felt at the time. I very much would rather not spend a lot of time dwelling on what it meant to be me at age... less than 18.

Wait, I just had a weird memory thought about childhood- I think of how much I desperately looked forward to summer and still do today. I don't know if I really means that I enjoyed those times or if it just meant that it was less burdensome, less threatening for me,a small period of relief from making mistakes, or what if a test or a class doesn't go perfectly. I don't know if that's mine, liking summer, because of who I am, or because of what was done to me.

When I first went to counseling at age 24... a few weeks into it, I formulated a scenario in my head where I was able to go back in time to my house and save my 8 year-old self from the rest of what would otherwise have happened to him. Now, more than 10 years later, my second round of counseling, my therapist has suggested that I might frequently reach out internally to that boy and talk to him, was challenged to let that happen freely. For me, the theraputic effect is letting my inner child hear from someone who cares about him that he is worth protecting, sticking up for, that he is better than the situation he is born into.

In these imaginery scenarios, that trapped 8 year old boy gets a way out, and he gets to see what happens when a grown man with more size, strength, power (inner and outer) more self-control, more kindness and understanding than the child's parental abusers, steps in and challenges the abusers to the extent the situation calls for, not with a sense of hate or vengence, but with the full knowledge of the severe imbalance, injustice, and secret pain and suffering kept concealed. That child gets to witness the introduction of the truth to his abusers, that they have no business parenting, and they no longer have the right to interact with that child, and he is truly no longer theirs.

The child has someone he can trust to turn to. The grown man can tell the child he's not expected to possess the strength and abilities of a balanced, fully grown adult; and that any inadequacies he feels are natural but unnecessary. Children are not made to endure, accept, cope, or confront abuse and/or deal with their abusers and stop the abuse of any others around him.

Still working on it.

workensleep
User avatar
Urban Rose
HAVOCA Sponsor
HAVOCA Sponsor
Posts: 4137
Joined: Fri Apr 08, 2011 5:02 pm
Has thanked: 9 times
Been thanked: 5 times

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by Urban Rose »

Wow workensleep,

That is inspired. Thanks for sharing.
workensleep wrote:Still working on it.
:) keep going,

Rose
Image"Life is not a matter of holding good cards but of playing a poor hand well." Robert Louis Stevenson
User avatar
SociallyAwkward
Member
Member
Posts: 103
Joined: Sat Mar 12, 2016 3:52 pm

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by SociallyAwkward »

If I thought about the person I could have been had it not been for all my negative influences..... It would piss me off.

To think of how intelligent I am despite all my set backs... Now just go back in time and give me some god damn love and support and keep that weirdo family out of my life. I would have actually written something by now ( I am a failure as a writer )

I didn't vote. I can't. It's too frustrating to think about. I want to be a normal healthy child with a regular family that doesn't split. I hate being disabled. No one takes me seriously!
rainaswish
HAVOCA Sponsor
HAVOCA Sponsor
Posts: 140
Joined: Sat Feb 13, 2016 7:51 am
Location: Houston, Tx USA (Alvin,Tx)
Been thanked: 3 times

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by rainaswish »

I see people reference their inner child but I know nothing about the theory. I just don't get it. I'm fairly new to therapy. It has not come up. The few articles I read were confusing.
Raina
Wavingnotdrowning

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by Wavingnotdrowning »

I understand the concept, I just can't connect. I have been a little grown up since my parents split when I was 4. Being an only child I was only around adults. I have felt responsible for my mother who I was always aware was vulnerable/fragile, my father doesn't connect to children at all he thinks they're pointless until they can hold an intelligent conversation. I find it hard to connect with little me, because I always had to be older than my years, can't be playful, can't connect to innocence, a time before the abuse.
User avatar
DisfunctionalMe
HAVOCA Sponsor
HAVOCA Sponsor
Posts: 552
Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 5:24 am

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by DisfunctionalMe »

My inner child is SO wounded! :cry:

After sending some of my posts here(ONLY MINE! I hope that's ok)to a friend of mine she said that she was "Astounded that I have managed to be such a caring and fun person"!

Dis Me aka Wild Thing
Never mind walking a mile in my shoes, try surviving a day in my head!
please be respectful of my personal wish that any religious or remotely spiritual content not be posted to me along with any content referring to self harm or suicide
User avatar
Loulou8
New Member
New Member
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2017 11:05 pm
Location: Peterborough

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by Loulou8 »

I have no inner child. Every day I die inside a little bit more and my inner child died many years ago. My inner child is lost forever. That fact hurts me, but sometimes there is no going back.
And breathe...
User avatar
cottoncandy-dreams
Member
Member
Posts: 442
Joined: Sat May 27, 2017 10:54 pm
Location: Oklahoma

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by cottoncandy-dreams »

Coloring and hugging stuffed animals makes my inner child happy. I feel like 15 year old me would have enjoyed childish things if he had been allowed. but i was forced to grow up so soon. poor treatment does that.
“This above all: to thine own self be true.” ― William Shakespeare, Hamlet
User avatar
Geranium
New Member
New Member
Posts: 22
Joined: Sun Oct 07, 2018 5:04 am

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by Geranium »

I've just started to do some inner child connecting and it's been a really positive experience. I've learned some neat things about myself. I have a hard time knowing what my tastes are in some things, what my true likes and dislikes are, but when I tap into my inner child it becomes much clearer.
User avatar
SunshineSmile
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 3503
Joined: Mon Nov 27, 2017 2:14 pm
Location: UK
Has thanked: 12 times
Been thanked: 15 times

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by SunshineSmile »

I voted "10" but this is something that has developed with me. I find that communicating with my inner child gives me a lot of peace - I've struggled so much over the years with self hatred. Now, listening to those inner parts of me has helped me to overcome the self hatred and given me peace. :)
To the world you may be one person;
But to one person you may be the world.

Dr Seuss


Havoca website


Havoca Sponsor
Grateful for my Safe Place
User avatar
Malm
New Member
New Member
Posts: 12
Joined: Fri Jun 07, 2019 12:29 am

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by Malm »

I have found the Inner child concept really helpful, I came across it through the work of John bradshaw (rip) and found it helped me to distinguish the victim in myself and how to deal with blame. I reccomended his work and I think it is especially useful to survivors.
User avatar
actnormal
Moderator
Moderator
Posts: 6077
Joined: Fri Nov 09, 2018 8:54 pm
Location: Surrey, England
Has thanked: 34 times
Been thanked: 36 times

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by actnormal »

I went for 10 because I think I am quite regressive in a quite a few behaviours, and I ought to be more grown up.
We are all made of stardust. Every piece of you and I was created in the final moments of an exploding star, somewhere out there. Ain’t that cool?
ImageMember Of The Year 2020Don’t act normal
Image
Hale
Member
Member
Posts: 39
Joined: Thu Sep 27, 2018 3:45 pm

Re: Poll - Inner Child

Post by Hale »

Can someone point me in the direction of Zion Bradshaw?

Many thanks
Post Reply

Return to “Poll of the Week”