Survivor Book of the Month – March 21

Survivor Book of the Month

This month’s book shifts the focus from the Survivor to the Survivor’s Loved One.  It delivers the answers to some commonly asked questions;

“But what about me?”
“Is it possible to go one day without dealing with the survivor’s issues?”
“Will we ever make love again?”
“Will the survivor love me in the end?”
“How do I know if I should throw in the towel?”

Based on in-depth interviews and her workshops for partners across the country, Laura Davis offers practical advice and encouragement to all partners—girlfriends, boyfriends, spouses, and lovers—trying to support the survivors in their lives while tending to their own needs along the way. She shows couples how to deepen compassion, improve communication, and develop an understanding of healing as a shared activity. Addressing partners’ most important questions, Allies in Healing covers:

  • The Basics—answers common questions about sexual abuse.
  • Allies in Healing—introduces key concepts of working and growing together.
  • My Needs and Feelings—teaches partners to recognize, value, and express their own needs.
  • Dealing with Crisis—includes strategies for handling suicidal feelings, regression, and hopelessness.
  • Intimacy and Communication—offers practical advice on dealing with distancing, control, trust, and fighting.
  • Sex—provides guidelines for coping with flashbacks, lack of desire, differences in sexual needs, and frustration.
  • Family issues—suggests a range of ideas for interacting with the survivor’s family.
  • Partners’ Stories—explores the struggles, triumphs, and courage of eight partners.

I’d be interested to hear your thoughts in the comments section below.

Allies in Healing: When the Person You Love Is a Survivor of Child Sexual Abuse 

by Laura Davis 

 buy at amzon

Allies in Healing: When the Person You Love Is a Survivor of Child Sexual Abuse 
Paperback – 9 July 2013
by Laura Davis

Review
“Partners can now feel supported and guided in their quest for healing–for themselves and for those they love and cherish.”–Dan Sexton, Childhelp, U.S.A

Synopsis
Focusing on people who were sexually abused as chilren, and based on interviews and her workshops for partners across the country, Laura Davies offers practical advice and encouragement to all partners – girlfriends, boyfriends, spouses and lovers – trying to support the survivors in their lives while tending to their own needs along the way. She shows couples how to deepen compassion, improve communication, and develop an understanding of healing as a shared activity. Addressing partners’ most important questions, this book answers common questions about sexual abuse, introduces key concepts of working and growing together, includes strategies for handling suicidal feelings, regression and hopelessness, offers practical advice on healing with distancing, control, trust and fighting, provides guidelines for coping with flashbacks, lack of desire, differences in sexual needs and frustration, and explores the struggles, triumphs and courage of eight partners. Laura Davis is a co-author of “The Courage to Heal” and author of “The Courage to Heal Workbook”.

About the Author
Laura Davis is the author of The Courage to Heal Workbook, Allies in Healing, Becoming the Parent You Want to Be, and I Thought We’d Never Speak Again. She teaches writing and lives with her family in Santa Cruz, California. 

Reader reviews

Excellent resource for Partners
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 22 July 2014 Verified Purchase
Excellent resource for partners of those who are survivors of child sexual abuse. I routinely recommend this to clients, although sometimes caution them to dip in and out rather than plan to read cover to cover – a question of calibrating for each individual what’s appropriate for their particular circumstances. Being a partner can be overwhelming enough, without dipping deeper into the world of their partner without appropriate therapeutic support.

Clare Myatt, Somatic Coach and Psychotherapist

A great book
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on 7 September 2016 Verified Purchase
Bought this ages ago and still haven’t read it all but it is something i can refer to when needed. Very helpful to Partners as i have found there isn’t much support out there for people like myself trying to support your loved one.

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