Trust – Inner Abuser
Is there a voice that says, ‘Don’t trust anyone?’ If there is it is because as a child you trusted a person and that trust was betrayed. As a child you don’t have the rational ability or maturity to say, I can’t trust that person. You may have told yourself that you couldn’t trust men, or women or anyone. When in fact it was just your abuser that you couldn’t trust.
In the early stages of your development you were taught about trust by watching the bonding between parents, by experiencing the safety of a home, love and warmth. As an abused child your whole idea about trust would have been changed, you would have received some very conflicting messages. These attitudes are taken into every aspect of your life and effect relationships and your interactions with others. You need to learn how to challenge others in order to discover how to trust others.
You may even be struggling to trust yourself. You have had difficulty in deciding who you can or can’t trust and this leaves you with an underlying confidence problem.
Trust is the corner stone of any close or intimate relationship. Without it there can be no real communication, no safety in being yourself. Lack of trust accounts for the majority of the problems that couples experience and , more importantly, it is the reason why so many couples are unable to solve their disagreements and subsequently break up. Likewise, if you don’t trust your inner radar, that is, your thoughts, feelings, and needs, you are likely to get yourself into situations that are unhealthy or even dangerous.