Trust is easy to lose and difficult to rebuild. This is especially so when you or your partner has actually done things to engender a lack of trust. If you or your partner have been judgmental, unsupportive, untruthful, abusive, or unreliable then you both need to pay attention to trust building behaviour. Rebuilding trust takes time. It is slow work. Both parties need to be patient. To rebuild trust you need to: Follow through on agreements Stay open Express feelings Provide information Be truthful Be consistent Work on your problems – don’t ignore them Admit your difficulties Keep lines of communication open – yes, that means no sulking!!
Each of these things could be considered a heroic deed and will require hard work and dedication. Remember if it’s worth fighting for then it’s worth making sacrifices. As you progress through the list you will slowly feel better about yourself and this will naturally increase your self esteem. Most importantly you need to remain talking. Communication, especially about the trust issue, will help you to belay any fears and it will prevent you from bottling up those feelings and emotions. Beyond this time will eventually heal the wound so that it doesn’t interfere with intimacy and love. We have a whole section on Relationships which consists of the following information; relationship skills, success, love, abuse, common problems, jealousy, unfaithfulness, sex, intimacy, conflict, and lots of exercises.