Part 3 – The Important Truth

Part 3 – The Important Truth What about false accusations? How do I know you’re telling the truth? I cannot speak much into this question about false accusations, as I have not personally met anyone who spoke of their sexual abuse/assault that I have come to believe was a falsehood. … Continue reading

Part 2 – An Important Truth

Part 2 – An Important Truth What happens after these first memories or utterances come up? Little do us victims know as much as we try not to face it ourselves, the truth will eventually find its way out—often many more years later as we continue to wrestle it back … Continue reading

Part 1 – An Important Truth

An Important Truth Why do many victims of sexual abuse/assault not tell anyone or report it when it happens? Sexual assault/abuse is a darkness which – without notice – steals another person’s: Innocence, respect, core value, self-esteem, physical protection and boundaries, sexual integrity, voice, safety, security and trust. Besides what … Continue reading

The Cycle of Abuse

The Cycle of Abuse It is massively confusing when the pain of the abuse you are experiencing, is so immense that the need to hide and protect yourself, clashes with your default yearning to be able to love the person hurting you; this is especially the case when your abuser … Continue reading

What are you doing to look after yourself now?

What are you doing to look after yourself now? We all need to take stock from time to time. It’s easy to get lost on the journey and sometimes we don’t even know that we may be lost. Like any process or procedure, it makes sense to rest, look backwards … Continue reading

Mindfulness

Mindfulness Mid way into therapy, I was finding that I was disappearing off in to my head, completely consumed with the recovery of memories, and trapped, with increasingly powerful flashbacks and no escape. Overwhelming, is such a clichéd word and over used, but it does sum up the experience (or … Continue reading

Life After Therapy

Life after therapy The first part of this piece, contains extracts taken from journal entries, because I think they accurately depict the state of mind I had from day to day, after therapy initially ended. I really wanted to capture how I was feeling at the time in this piece, … Continue reading

The End of Therapy

The End of Therapy Thinking of the end: I have learnt, faced and remembered so much since I started therapy. I have spent hours talking, processing and writing about all of this crap, sharing some of it publicly. I have found a little bit of purpose, and sourced some courage … Continue reading

Positive Self Regard

Positive self regard Finding purpose I met Tanya (yes same name) through the school my children go to and at the time, Tanya also had children in the same school. None of our children (7 between us) were in the same classes, but Tanya and I, were both pregnant with … Continue reading

My self-destruct button and I

My self-destruct button and I Origin of self harming behaviour I have always had an “all or nothing” type nature and a bit of a competitive streak. I’m not sure if this originates, from simply having siblings, or whether this is an inherent feature. (Is it because of nature or … Continue reading