Poll - Drama Triangle

[Jamie]

Can you relate to the drama triangle?

Most of us unconsciously react to life from a position of victim-hood. Anytime we refuse to take responsibility for ourselves, we are opting to play victim. This leaves us feeling at the mercy of, done in by and un-faired against; no matter what our situation might be.



Victim-hood consists of three positions outlined by Stephen Karpman, a teacher of Transactional Analysis, on what he called the "Drama Triangle". Having learned of it some thirty years ago, it has been one of the most important tools in my personal, as well as professional life. As my understanding of the Drama Triangle has expanded, so has my appreciation for this simple, but powerfully accurate instrument. I call it the "shame machine" because through it we unconsciously re-enact our vicious cycles, thereby creating shame. Every dysfunctional interaction takes place on the Drama Triangle! Until we make these dynamics conscious, we cannot transform them. Unless we transform them, we cannot move forward on our journey towards re-claiming our spiritual heritage.

Read more here.

Can you relate to this?

[Piglet]

I put yes.

As I was reading the attached info relating to the different parts of the triangle, I was sitting there thinking - that's like such and such a person in my family. I can see where they fit into the triangle too (although I realise that's my perception of them and not theirs!)

[Jamie]

I did the same. i find i drift around the triangle too - I can become different parts of it at different times.

[starshinesometimes]

I find this concept interesting..
I was explaining just the other day about how hard it is to escape feeling like a victim. I think first you have to embrace that you are a victim (so you dont live in denial)
In any other crime there is a sense of a 'victim' so you have to allow that without it consuming you and becomming the thing you most identify with. I spent so long trying not to be a victim that I wasnt really dealing with any of the emotions I was having, I was in a state of denial which stalled the beginning of my recovery process.
But then once you have acknowledged that you were a victim to damaging actions you have to empower yourself by refusing to allow your self perception to be one purely of a victim.
It's so difficult to take responsibilty for oneself at times.
When you have had things 'just happen' to you from such a young age you start to feel as though you dont have choices and life just sort of happens 'to' you without you feeling like youre participating.
Ive found myself stuck, expecting good things to just happen and its a terrible mistake to make. Its a shame that the bad things just sort of happen and yet the good things we really have to strive for.. I suppose today Im feeling like a victim!